IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENTS & REGULAR SEASON MVPS/POWER RANKING - AsiaFortress Cup 17

Important Announcement: CiBaiNoLimit2 - Cease and Desist

Before I begin this entry of the blog, I have an important announcement to make.

It has come to my attention that there is an impersonator. CiBaiNoLimit2 has made a blog on Sedna and Submarine's prestigious Highlander league, "ATF2L", posing as me. If you want to read it, read it here: https://atf2l-blogs.blogspot.com/, though you can really tell absolutely no effort was put into it, and reading it is simply a waste of 30 seconds of your life. I need to say this as many people in the Highlander community believe I wrote this: This is not me, and I will never make a blog this terrible.

An example of CiBaiNoLimit2's A+ Journalism

I am offended that people would believe that I, CiBaiNoLimit, would stoop as low as to get easy views on blogs through writing such garbage-tier insults, and offended that I would even write about Highlander in the first place.

I am not saying that I am the only one allowed to write in this format - in fact there have been many amazing blogs written by others. For example, Maxi2k's Highlander magazine clearly had way more care effort put into it than what I put in here.

However, I denounce all that this fake CiBaiNoLimit stands for. If he wishes to actually produce something not under my name in the future, I by all means cheer him on. But never impersonate me, or try to take credit for my work - I will fuck you up. 

Everything written by me will always be posted either on this blog, or on my discord account CiBaiNoLimit#3678. 

AsiaFortress Cup 17 - Regular Season MVPs and Power Rankings

I said there would be a post for Week 4 listing all the MVPs, but three teams died in the first three weeks and 60% of the matches in that week were forfeited. So in other words, Division Three is dead. :cry:

???

Anyways, despite an overwhelming amount of matches this season being forfeited, there were a few players who I felt really stood out. In this blogpost, I'm going to list out some of stars of the Division that have really stood out so far, and an updated power ranking for the teams that have yet to die

Power Rankings

1.  love how you play <3 - This team has had literally the luckiest seeding ever, getting matched against either dogshit teams or dead teams, and they are looking to be the strongest team in Division Three so far. In my wildly inaccurate pre-season ranking, I only put them at second but I have since learned that j0e is garbage. They have muscled through the whole season and look to be going strong into playoffs with Varien and Clashe carrying them, so I think this is a pretty accurate choice for the strongest team in the division. The huge roster changes in cutting off dead weights Kron and Toxic really paid off.

2. Fossil Burger - Although Fossil Burger is looking significantly weaker than the team above, and didn't look like too much of a threat pre-season, all of the players have made significant improvements and are no longer a 100kg burden to ozy, but only a 20kg burden to ozy. With star demo and sandbagger ozy leading the charge, they could potentially be the threat that dethrones Clashe & Co. from the coveted golden bird medal of AFC's Division Three. They've also made the choice to pick up Mega Retard Sedna on flank scout, who doesn't seem to have stopped offclassing/throwing all the time but this time he is playing in Division Three, where people stand still in front of snipers, which is the prime hunting ground for Sedna. Also, they went 4-5 against the Division Two Thai team, and Wolfpack only got 2-4 against the Thais. Using logic, Fossil Burger > Wolfpack, and Bufo (LMAO) > mickey. 

3. NotReallyGood - The staples of Division Three, these guys have finally made it out of the swamp of mid-tier mediocrity and made it into the upper-echelons of Division Three. With a huge 3-0 victory and tied map against Ascension, I'm pretty confident that these guys don't eat shit anymore, and could probably beat Fossil Burger if they tried hard enough. No longer NotReallyGood, but now KindOfDecentIGuessMaybeGood. 

4. Ascension - I guess the Australian teams sucked, since one died and this one looks to be getting a participant medal. #WhitePeopleSuckAtTF2

5. j0e - No more Mal (hot girl) means no more relevance in this blog. Anyways, this team seems to be the most inconsistent team ever, going from huge Ws like 5-0s in scrims against former top seed Nord VPN and 5-2 maps against love how you play <3, to tied matches against Anmi Face Syndrome and having a 170 dpm soldier. I can't believe I put these guys at #1 in my last ranking when they have the consistency of an IBD patient's excrement. Anyways, it's now playoffs so these guys are completely irrelevant. 

6. anmi face syndrome - At first, it looked like these guys would be dead last due to losing their greatest asset in Poeyy. Then, it looked like they had a chance at playoffs, picking up two time Division Two first place and Division One third place medic casiisac/demera/dancegelt/suki ta/any edgelord name you can think of, and Division Two third place, ex-TMG roamer Comby, stolen off of the corpse of jumperGANG. They had a pretty solid roster with acesty and ukk as two great players. Despite this, even with their revised roster, their crushing defeat against NRG because D4LE pulled a Rustic completely demoralized their team and led to their placement here, back at dead last.

MVPS of the Regular Season

And now, for the moment you have all been waiting for! The MVPs of the Regular Season so far! Don't bother looking for your name or getting your hopes up, you won't be here since you probably suck at this game. 

Clashe - Pocket Scout for love how you play <3

Clashe is in contention to be the best player this season. Prior to his disappearance two years ago, Clashe was the best scout in Division Two. Now that he's back, he seems to have retained his skill, demonstrated through shitting all over 12vies in scrims and matches. He should not be in Division Three. 

Memories - Flank Scout for love how you play <3

Even though he's Australian with 100 ping, Memories is an extremely good flank scout. As soon as Memories came to Asia, he set himself apart from the rest of the Australian refugee boat he landed with by not being an annoying fucktard and sucking off Division One dicks (unlike Auz) and being a consistently good player (unlike j0e). Memories is my second favorite white man, right after Catbus Slayers' very own pale slenderman. 

Varien - Roamer for love how you play <3

Loud, annoying and Muslim how I would describe Varien in three words. A former jumper main, I can't count how many years Varien has been playing Division Three for, but he has exceeded his performance in PURE Season 3 and is contention for best roamer this season. With his amazing bombs, he can consistently outdamage his pocket soldier Fany (waddler) or his Demoman Pepelord. Truly the perfect Muslim suicide bomber, it seems Ramadan has not stopped him from raping Division Three scouts.

Comby - Roamer for anmi face syndrome

The only true jumper main to still play in Division Three after the death of jumperGANG due to Hellstarry's severe mental illnesses, Comby stood out by being one of the only soldiers in Division 3 to never waddle. Because the majority of scouts in Division Three suffer from a disease that prevents them from looking up, Comby was always able to capitalize on the inability for scouts to deny soldiers and fly in over their heads. Although he is certainly not as good as he was three years ago, he is still a great roamer and has really shown this with his bombs.

Acesty - Demoman for anmi face syndrome

Great DPM at the expense of his medic's heal spread, Acesty is the ultimate damage farmer who loves to spam stickies and not lock out choke. Now that he has picked up a new 144hz monitor, Acesty has received the Tannie effect, with a massive improvement. (He has not received the downsides of the Tannie Effect, with the plateau and dive in performance, and ending worse off than before) Acesty almost beat Space in Ultiduo, and as a Demoman his DM has greatly improved. Despite this, his team was not able to make it to playoffs, but I have high hopes for Acesty's future career.

ozy12 - Demoman for Fossil Burger

Another contender for best player of the Division, ozy's creative traps to catch little Division Three monkeys have worked extremely well, always catching people off guard and allowing his team to push. If it were not for ozy12, Fossil Burger would not have 90% of the opportunities they play off of, and would probably be dead last in the power ranking. If it were not for this player, this God Amongst Men, Fossil Burger would be the shittiest team in the division.

Chipsy - Pocket Scout for NRG

Indian guy shoots good and has good calls. That's all I know. Probably washed up, but still 1000% better than Kook will ever be.

Smazza - Pocket Scout for Ascension

An OzFortress High player, I was expecting great things for Smazza this season, among 40+ frag and 400+ dpm games. Although its been quite a let down, with Smazza often getting outfragged by the other pocket scouts, he is still a great player and probably the best player on Ascension, but that isn't really saying much since those guys are still a great big question mark for me. 

Casiisac - Medic for anmi face syndrome

What? Casiisac is back? Amazing! One of the best medics in Asia has returned! But wait...what the fuck is this? Ignoring Hero's horrendously poo-poo K/D, Casii's 242 DT/M and 3 ubers compared to Narwhal's 8 is embarassing, but I refuse to believe Casii was not throwing. Casiisac is one of the best medics in Asia, and even though I have honestly no idea how well he played since I've almost never watched his cam in a scrim or match, I think that he should at least have an honorary spot on this list for winning Division Two twice. 

Narwhal - Medic for love how you play <3

Another Division Two gold medalist, Narwhal is a member of Emonemo's Xenia.blk posse/Ron Tan babysitters. Despite the fact that the majority of his friends are extremely annoying and really bad at this game, Narwhal sets himself apart by being an actually good player. Nothing else to say about him, except he lives in Malaysia so you know his internet has the grace of a reversing dump truck.

Well, that's it for the Week 8 Regular Season update. But before you go, I have an important message from our sponsor, The Biker Conglomerate.

Presented by Biker Group™ - Tricycle Pugs© & Training Wheels Mentorship Program

Are you sick of getting vigorously dicked down by Deceptive in Massive Ping, getting bullied by fucktards in Weed Pugs, getting cucked by Bobby's stupid +1 rules, or being invited to Biker Pugs®, just to get banned by Space after one pug? 

Well, the Biker Group™ has a solution for you - Tricycle Pugs! After completely dominating the Division 1/2 pug scene with their highly successful Biker Pugs®, founder and CEO Jub is looking towards the new market of Division 3/4 inhouse pugs left in the wake of PURE Novice's death. Spearheaded by CEO of the new Biker Group™ subsidiary, Mickey, Tricycle Pugs is the new and upcoming Division 3/4 Pug group.

Join here at: https://discord.gg/U8jDwbHj 

When you join the Tricycle Pugs© group, you will be placed into skill level groups based on either age, or skill level. If you are already a member of Biker Pugs, you will receive the Biker role. If you are 13 or low-Div 2/high Div-3, you will receive the 13 year old role. If you are a 12v or anywhere at or below Division 3, you will receive the 12v role. If you are a 7, you will receive the 7 year old role. 

Throughout the month, Bikers may nominate players to be promoted to Biker Pugs, who will be reviewed for promotion at the end of the month. This means doing well in Tricycle Pugs means being invited to big-boy pugs. (Keep in mind nomination does not mean guaranteed promotion.)

As well as this, the Biker Group would also like to introduce the Training Wheels Mentorship Program:
A mentorship program that will help you improve. With highly experienced and prestigious mentors like Teejay, AiShou, and 26 mentoring one-on-one, sign-up now for guaranteed demo reviews once per week. The first 11 players to sign-up will be admitted to the program each month.

Over the course of the Training Wheels Mentorship Program, you will be mentored one-on-one over the course of a month, before graduating as a class, meaning being promoted by one role in the Training Wheels program, or being up for nomination as a biker. Apply now in #training-wheels-application in the Training Wheels Discord!

If you have any queries related to Biker Group™, contact the following:
Chief Executive Officer, Chairman and Founder: Jub

President: Space

Chief Operating Officer: Bio

Chief Financial Officer: Ethan
Chief Technology Officer: Hazeem

Head of Human Resources: Casiisac
Chief Marketing Office & Head of Tricycle PUGs: Mickey

Quality Control and second-in-command of Triycle PUGs: Megu
Vice Presidents: Calypso & BON

Managing Directors: Ruee, LeGO & TonyTheTiger 

Janitor: Mellow

Sign-ups for Training Wheels open on May 19th, Wednesday at 6:00pm, GMT +8.
Apply here in channel #training-wheels-application: https://discord.gg/PzeFcwJW

Use the following format to apply:

Name:
Class of mentorship:
Steam URL: 
Current Team and Division:
Past Experience: (Seasons played, placements):
Preferred method of communication (either Discord ID or Steam Message): 
Availability:
Other Information: 

All sign-ups not following this format, not in the correct channel, or deemed to be a joke will be ignored. If you have any further questions message mickey#6351 on Discord.